Get the shit out of the way

Ok where to start....

I was recently kicked out of College and im still not sure how to feel about that, that place was like a 2nd home to me. I never was the student type however, I like to live on the edge of life and never know whats going to happen next. Life is an adventure and you need to embrace it otherwise, your fucked. However my theory on life has been disrupted, this whole college thing has got me real down because now I feel like a failure. On top of that my dog died, shes been in the family for years and despite her being annoying now and then I loved that dog. Yet once again my emotions stay deep down, that cant be healthy right? Or is it just because she is a dog so it doesnt matter? I dunno, for now I dont really care.

Of course the main source of my pain is a woman, pretty cliche huh? I cant help it though, she is so different and a complete mystery to me. Im afraid my feelings are based upon my curiousity for her and not because I may love her. Dont get me wrong, she is my friend and I do love her the problem lies in the fact I would rather it be curiousity than being in love. I have only been in love once, that ended badly and I wont go into the depressive details. But anyways im typing shit as I go and not really caring if it makes sense, this probably sounds like a load of crap right?

Im gonna end this on this note, no im not depressed but I do feel alone. Nothing in life will get me down I will always put on a smile and ignore the bad, like I said, Embrace life or your fucked

Much Love